Thread:172.1.1.31/@comment-172.1.1.31-20130222234207/@comment-172.1.1.31-20130317230746

OH GROW UP! I have GREAT ideas.

HERE'S THE TRANSCRIPT FOR "IF CHICKENS COULD TIME TRAVEL":

(WARNING: FANON! (But it's real in MAD Magazine, and not this show))

Announcer: What if chickens could time travel? Here's what would happen! They'd make their share...

Waiter: C'mon, Cacciatore! (Busts in) We need to know tonight's special!

(POP!)

Announcer: ...of wrong place/wrong time appearences. The annual Fortune 500 list would be peppered with trillionaire chickens. Their effect on our culture would be vastly greater. They'd spend a little time taking in the French Revolution...

Chicken: Hey, Pierre! Don't just kneel there! RUN AROUND!

(CHOP!)

Announcer: ...when people's heads were being chopped off. They'd be calling all the shots in the things that taste just like chicken department. And they'd rarely set their arrival date correctly...

Man at the Alamo: Man, you should have been here 7 months and five days ago!

Announcer: ...because at the end of the day, they're still frickin' chickens.

(5-SECOND CARTOON)

'Announcer': Any and all negative references to chickens would be oliberated.

Jason's Mom: (On phone with the school) Jason won't be coming to school today. He's come down with titmouse pox.