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Cowboys & Alien Force is a crossover between Cowboys & Aliens and Ben 10: Alien Force.

This segment is from MAD Season 2, Episode 6 (32): Cowboys & Alien Force / ThunderLOLcats.

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Summary

A cowboy wakes up without memory and he has a strange alien bracelet that transforms him into 10 different aliens! But Jon Favreau keeps kidnapping writers and titles of the film. And the cowboy has more wrist bands.

References

MAD References

Characters

Transcript

(Scene begins looking up at the sky with an eagle screeching)

(Scene goes down to show Jake Lonergan in the middle of the desert looking confused)

Jake Lonergan: (Gasps) I have no memory.

(Buzz Lightyear gets up on the right side of him)

Buzz: I have no memory.

(Jake Lonergan punches Buzz Lightyear)

(Jedediah Benjamin Tennison gets up on the left side of him)

Jedediah Benjamin Tennison: I have no pants!

(Jake Lonergan punches Jedediah Benjamin Tennyson)

Cowboy: Hey, Punchy McPunch-A-Lot.

(Scene goes to the left to show the Cowboy riding on a horse)

Cowboy: I think you stole that boy's outfit.

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan who is getting up from the ground)

Jake Lonergan: What makes you say that?

(Scene goes to the Cowboy)

Cowboy: Well, that there's (Scene backs out to show an unconscious Jedediah Benjamin Tennison with no pants and the crows picking on him) Jedediah Benjamin Tennison. And you're wearing his (Scene goes to Jake Lonergan's pants while a person whistles) pants, (Scene goes to the top of Jake Lonergan's body) his hat, and his Omnitrix.

(Scene zooms in on the Omnitrix and it beeps on Jake Lonergan's hand)

Jake Lonergan: Hmm. Don't remember taking it.

(Scene goes to the Cowboy)

Cowboy: Of course you don't, 'cause that would be copyright (Money ding is heard) infringement.

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan)

Jake Lonergan: Oh. (Chuckles) Then I guess I should change the title and get rid of the guy who knows about it.

(Scene goes to the Cowboy)

Cowboy: That sounds like a plan. Wait. What?

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan pressing the Omnitrix and turning into an alien)

(Jake punches a cowboy to the ground)

(Title card 1: "Cowboys & Alien Force")

(Scene resumes with Jake Lonergan walking through the town of Absolution)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: Jake Lonergan, (A group of people surround Jake Lonergan) you stole something from me.

(Camera zooms in on Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: What do you have to say for yourself?

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan)

Jake Lonergan: I have no memory.

(Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde punches Jake Lonergan)

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan's head in the water and Dory swims to him)

Dory: I also have no memory.

(Jake Lonergan punches Dory)

Ella Swenson: (While Doc and Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde punch Jake Lonergan) Stop fighting. (Scene zooms in on her and other folk people) Something weird is coming this way.

(Scene goes to Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde holding Jake Lonergan)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: How can you tell?

(Scene goes back to Ella Swenson and other folk people)

Ella Swenson: His wrist is all lit up.

(Scene goes back to Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde holding Jake Lonergan)

Jake Lonergan: (While looking at his wrist) No, it's not.

Ella Swenson: Not that wrist.

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan's other wrist to show another pink bracelet with hearts on it)

Ella Swenson: (While pointing at it) That wrist.

(Scene zooms in on the bracelet and it shoots out 3 hearts that disappear quickly)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: Is that a (Scene backs out to show Doc and Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde) My Little Pony bracelet?

Jake Lonergan: I sure hope not.

(Ponies in the background can be heard roaring in the background)

(Scene backs out to show in the far sky background a flash and then colorful dots heading towards Absolution)

(Scene goes to the sky to show My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic ponies flying towards the town of Absolution)

(Scene goes to the folktown people looking scared)

Ella Swenson: (Screams)

(Scene goes to one of the ponies, who looks angry, and zooms in on her)

(Scene goes back to the folktown where people are screaming and a person got taken away by a rope)

(Title card 2: "Cowboys & Equestrians")

(Scene goes back to Ella Swenson staying in her place while people are running and avoiding the attacks from the ponies or getting caught by the ropes)

Ella Swenson: Wait, we did the opening title already.

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan and Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde)

Jake Lonergan: We did? I don't remember them.

(Mr. Forgetful pops up on the left side of Jake Lonergan)

Mr. Forgetful: I don't remember them either.

(A rope captures Mr. Forgetful and takes him away)

(Scene goes to Mr. Forgetful being taken away in the sky)

Mr. Forgetful: (Yells)

(Scene goes back to Jake Lonergan and Doc)

Doc: Something strange about these ponies. They have huge eyes and weird bulbous heads. That's not what ponies look like.

(Jake Lonergan punches Doc in the face)

Jake Lonergan: Ponies also don't fly, Doc.

(A horse is heard neighing in the background)

(Scene goes to the sky where a pony with green hair in a hot air balloon is coming towards Absolution, scene goes back to Jake Lonergan in which he uses his My Little Pony bracelet and pulls out a rainbow cannon, scene goes to Jake Lonergan shooting down the hot air balloon and the hot air balloon crashes into the entrance making dust go everywhere, after the dust clears up, the scene goes to Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde looking at the My Little Pony bracelet)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: (While the My Little Pony rainbow cannon is put away) You're not gonna tell me you don't remember how either of those things got on your wrists?

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan)

Jake Lonergan: Afraid not.

(Scene goes to Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: Any chance you remember that last Indiana Jones movie?

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan)

Jake Lonergan: That I wish I could forget.

(Scene goes to a sad Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde while camera zooms in on him and sad music is heard playing)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: Yep. Me, too. (Wipes tear out of eye with hand) Me, too.

(Glow light appears on the left and Ella Swenson comes from the right side of the camera screen)

Ella Swenson: Oh, no, more trouble. (Puts on sunglasses) Your wristband is glowing again.

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan looking at his My Little Pony bracelet)

Jake Lonergan: No, it ain't.

Ella Swenson: Not that one.

(Ella Swenson punches Jake Lonergan)

Ella Swenson: That one.

(Glowing light disappears)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: Shoot. (Scene goes to Jake Lonergan's wrist to show 3 Silly Bandz) Are those Silly Bandz?

(Scene backs out to show Jake Lonergan)

Jake Lonergan: This is getting weird.

(Title card 3: "Cowboys & Silly Bands")

(Scene goes back to Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde, Ella Swenson and Jake Lonergan)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde and Ella Swenson: We did that already.

(Scene zooms in on Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde and Ella Swenson)

Ella Swenson: Those bands don't shoot lasers, too, do they?

Jake Lonergan: Don't be crazy. They're Silly Bands. Why would they-

(Silly Bandz unleash a powerful red laser that burns Ella Swenson and turns her into ash)

(Scene zooms in on Jake Lonergan, who is looking at his Silly Bandz)

Jake Lonergan: I guess a better name might be Shooty Bands.

(Scene goes to the ash as it wobbles and it transforms back into Ella Swenson)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: What the?

(Scene zooms in on Jake Lonergan)

Jake Lonergan: You ain't dead?

(Ella Swenson walks towards Jake Lonergan and punches him in the face)

Ella Swenson: No. (Scene slowly zooms in on her and sad music is played) The truth is, I'm not human. I only took this form so you'd like me.

Jake Lonergan: I appreciate that, darlin'.

(Jake Lonergan kisses Ella Swenson only for her to manufacture and transform into Applejack)

(Jake Lonergan lets go off Applejack and spits)

Jake Lonergan: (Spits) You're one of them? I can't believe I just kissed a pony.

(Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde walks up behind Jake Lonergan)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: I can't believe a man can own so many bracelets.

(Scene zooms in on Applejack)

Applejack: My name's Applejack. But we're not the ones stealing your people. We're here to find out who's kidnapping us as well.

(Scene backs out to show Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde and Jake Lonergan)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: Then who in tarnation is stealing our--

(A giant metal claw from the sky grabs Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde and takes him away leaving a white garment behind)

Jake Lonergan: Only one way to find out.

(Scene zooms in on Applejack walking towards Jake Lonergan while he gets on her)

Jake Lonergan: Come on, Applejack. Let's ride.

Applejack: Um, I'm not one of the ponies who can fly.

Jake Lonergan: Now you tell me.

(A giant metal claw from the sky picks up Jake Lonergan and Applejack and takes them to the ship where Jon Favreau is sitting on his throne. Jake Lonergan gasps.)

Applejack and Jake Lonergan: Jon Favreau?

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan riding on Applejack)

Jake Lonergan: Aren't you directing this movie?

(Scene goes to Jon Favreau)

Jon Favreau: Yes, but the script needs work, so I keep kidnapping (Scene backs out to show writers typing on typewriters) writers to help me finish it.

(Writer pops of the right side and hands a script to Jon Favreau)

Jon Favreau: No!

(Jon Favreau throws away script and punches the writer)

Jon Favreau: Still not there.

(Jon Favreau presses button and the giant metal claw goes down)

(Scene goes to Iron Man and Captain America talking in the Avengerteria)

Iron Man: So then he says, I'm not gonna direct the third one. And I'm like...

(The giant metal claw grabs Iron Man and takes him back to the ship and on a typewriter)

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan still riding on Applejack)

Jake Lonergan: What's so difficult? It's a mash-up of two genres. They do it on "MAD" all the time.

(Scene goes to Jon Favreau)

Jon Favreau: Really? Good to know.

(Jon Favreau presses button and scene goes to the MAD headquarters where the giant metal claw goes through the building and picks up Alfred E. Neuman and puts him in a typewriter)

(Alfred E. Neuman cracks his knuckles and begins to write and then the scene goes to Alfred E. Neuman giving his script to Jake Lonergan first)

Jake Lonergan: (Sighs) Let's hope we all forget this one.

(Jake Lonergan gives the script to Jon Favreau and he reads it while the scene zooms in on him a little)

Jon Favreau: Perfect!

(Title card 4: "Cowboys & Alfreds")

(Scene resumes with Jon Favreau and Alfred E. Neuman)

Jon Favreau: (While he holds out his hand to shake Alfred E. Neuman's hand) Nice working with you.

(Two alien hands come out of Alfred E. Neuman's body and one of his hands shakes Jon Favreau's hand and leaves goo behind)

Jon Favreau: Ew.

(Segment ends)

Trivia

  • Buzz Lightyear appeared in this segment acting like he was from The Buzz Identity.
  • The three people in the beginning who lost their memory (or pants) were:
    1. Buzz Lightyear from Toy Story
    2. Jake Lonergan from Cowboys & Aliens
    3. Jedediah Benjamin Tennison from Ben 10
  • Jake Lonergan had an Omnitrix, a My Little Pony bracelet, and Silly Bandz on his wrists.
  • The alien Jake Lonergan turns into looks similar to Diamondhead and Chromastone.
  • There were four titles in all throughout the segment:
    • Title #4
    • Title #3
    • Title #2
    • Title #1
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