Law & Ogre is a take-off of Law & Order and is spoofed with Shrek.

This segment is from MAD Season 1, Episode 20: Ko-Bee Movie / Law & Ogre.


Shrek and Donkey take the law into their own hands.



  • Kevin Bernard
  • Cyrus Lupo
  • Papa Bear
  • Shrek
  • Donkey
  • Announcer
  • Goldilocks
  • Big Bad Wolf
  • Grumpy Bear
  • Princess Fiona
  • Puss in Boots
  • Chicago Bears
  • Yogi Bear


(Scene begins at an apartment building, police tapes wrapped on the door. Inside, Kevin Bernard takes off the sheet to reveal... a recently dead bear?)

Kevin Bernard: Victim seems to be one of the Three Bears.

Cyrus Lupo: Which one?

Kevin Bernard: I don't know. (Covers the dead bear back) The furry one! They're bears, for crying out loud! Bigger question is: what's he doin' livin' in New York City?

Cyrus Lupo: Well, LA's too glitzy, Chicago's too cold, but New York is juu--

Kevin Bernard: Okay, I get it! Better start dusting for prints.

(One slam of the door and a camera swipe later... enter Shrek and Donkey.)

Shrek: Not so fast! I believe fairy tale characters are our jurisdiction. (Donkey appears)

Cyrus Lupo: According to who? (Unholsters and aims sidearm)

Shrek: According to Rumpelstiltskin, (Holds up and opens a contract scroll with Rumplestiltskin, "The Rump" on it) who said I could have the life I always wanted.

Kevin Bernard: And you chose to be a New York detective?

Donkey: Trust me, I begged him to be a Gilmore girl.

(Scene goes black)

Announcer: In the criminal justice system, the people are protected by attorneys. The cartoon characters, however... well, let's face it: we just like this title.

(Title card: Law and Ogre)

Donkey: Hee-Haw!



Shrek: All right, Goldilocks, when was the last time you saw Papa Bear?

Goldilocks: Not since he had me arrested for breaking into his house. And who knew bears had lawyers? Seriously, he's a bear.

Shrek: Well, he's also dead!

Goldilocks: What?! Does that mean his apartment's for rent?

Shrek: Do you know anyone who'd want to hurt Papa Bear?

Goldilocks: Probably another bear, I guess. Hey, uh, you're not gonna tell anyone else about that apartment, are you?

Shrek: Are you getting all this?

Donkey: No, but check this out.

(Scene goes to Donkey's drawing of another donkey riding a skateboard down a rail, however he "Fails")

(Donkey says "Hee-Haw!" and scene suddenly goes black)

(Big Bad Wolfgangbucks

222 Easy Street St.

Tuesday, September 31)

(Scene resumes at Wolfgang Bucks)

Big Bad Wolf: Grumpy Bear? Yeah, he works in the kitchen. Blue bear, shoots rain out of his gut.

Shrek: Notice anything strange about him?

Big Bad Wolf: Other than he's a blue bear who shoots rain out of his gut? Not really, no.

Shrek: Well, he's wanted, in connection with the murder of Papa Bear.

Big Bad Wolf: Papa Bear's been murdered?! Um, that means his apartment's available?

Donkey: Shrek, look!

Shrek: (off-screen) Grumpy Bear!

Grumpy Bear: Care Bear-Stare!

(Grumpy shows his belly, which releases a sonic wave.)

Shrek: Gah!

(Grumpy runs away)

Donkey: What are you doing?

Shrek: Going deep.

(Shrek throws Donkey)

Donkey: Aah!

(Grumpy is seen running)

Donkey: Ooh, Mamma Mia's still playing! (Note to reader: They didn't make this sketch in '08.)

(Grumpy is seen running again)

Donkey: I smell pretzels!

(Donkey catches Grumpy and lands in trash can)

Shrek: That was a Slam Donkey!

(Donkey says "Hee-Haw!" and scene suddenly goes black)


(Scene resumes to Shrek)

Shrek: And as soon as he saw us, he took off running.

Princess Fiona: No further questions, your honor.

Grumpy Bear: I object. This court is stacked against me!

(Gavel sounds)

Puss in Boots: What are you talking about?

Grumpy Bear: The prosecutor is his wife, you're one of his friends, and that is definitely not a jury of my peers!

Chicago Bears Player: You're going down!

Chicago Bears: Rah!

Puss in Boots: How does the jury find the defendant?

(Grumpy catches a football and the Chicago Bears tackle him.)

Chicago Bears: Raah!

Puss in Boots: Sounds like guilty to me. Case closed.

(Donkey says "Hee-Haw!" and scene suddenly goes black)

(Is This Over Yet?)

(Scene resumes to Donkey)

Donkey: Shrek, call on line one.

Shrek: (Picks up) Shrek.

???: Grumpy was right, Shrek. You got the wrong bear.

Shrek: Who is this?

???: Hee hee hee hee! I'd love to talk more, but I must go. I'm having a friend for a pic-a-nic.

Shrek: I'll find ya.

???: Ho ho! I don't think so. I'm smarter than the average bear.

(Scene backs up to reveal Yogi Bear.)

Yogi Bear: D'oh! That probably gave it away.

(Yogi Bear hangs up phone and walks to Jellystone Park... probably with Papa Bear's body in his basket.)

(Donkey appears)

Donkey: Hey, look! I drew the credits!

(Scene goes to Donkey's credits and segment officially ends.)


  • Cyrus said a Goldilocks and the three bears joke when Kevin asked him why Papa Bear is in New York. His full sentence was, "Well, LA's too glitzy, Chicago's too cold, but New York is just right."
  • Shrek's poster had Rumpelstiltskin with words "The rump" and a arrow pointing to his butt which says 100% BEEF.
  • There were four "Hee-Haw!"s and subtitles all together.
  • There is a set by Fisher-Price that is based on this segment, which was released November 2011.
  • Shrek's choices were either to be a New York detective or a Gilmore Girl.
  • If you look closely at the employees behind the Big Bad Wolf, you can see SpongeBob SquarePants and Homer Simpson as two of the employees.
  • One of the food at the Wolfgang Bucks was a pig.
  • Second time Alfred E. Neuman appeared as the Statue of Liberty. First was Cliffordfield.
  • Shrek's joke of Slam Donkey could mean Slam Dunk.
  • The crowd behind Grumpy Bear in the court were:
    1. Hammershark
    2. Monkey
    3. Giraffe
    4. Dragon
    5. Owl
  • Shrek's cup said Ogre Test 97.
  • In the Law & Order title, the word "Order" was surrounded by a red outline, while the word "Ogre" was surrounded by a green outline.
  • 6th time SpongeBob gets spoofed, the first was WALL·E·NATOR, Cliffordfield, Who Wore it Better?, Celebrities Without Their Makeup, Celebrity Birthdays and now Law & Ogre.
  • When Yogi Bear walks away to Jellystone Park, there was a spoof on the "Jellystone Park" sign. Instead of saying "Jellystone", it said "Bellystone."
  • If the camera zooms up on Grumpy Bear in court, Geoffrey the Giraffe can be seen behind him.
  • False Antagonist: Grumpy Bear
  • True Antagonist: Yogi Bear
  • The four subtitles during the "Hee-Haw!"s were:
    1. Goldilocks' Apartment Upper Lower Eastern West Side
    2. Big Bad Wolfgang Bucks 222 Easy Street St. Tuseday, September 31
    3. BAD JOKE!
    4. Is This Over Yet?
  • This is the only time the credits have been different.
Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.