Changes: The Superhero Millionaire Matchmaker

Revision as of 02:08, 12 September 2020

The Superhero Millionaire Matchmaker is a crossover between superheroes and the Millionare Matchmaker.

This segment is from MAD Season 2, Episode 13 (39): Spy vs. Spy Kids / Abs-duction.

Summary

The Millionaire Matchmaker meets her biggest challenge yet: Iron Man and Batman.

References

MAD References

Characters

Batman
Iron Man
Patti Stanger
Rachel Federoff
Destin Pfaff
Catwoman

Transcript

Patti Stanger: Hi, I'm Patti Stanger, the Millionaire Matchmaker! Ever hear how I can't find my perfect match? Well, I'm sure I can find yours. So who do we have this week?

Destin Pfaff: Well, I've got a millionaire playboy named Tony Stark who owns a giant robot suit.

Rachel Federoff: I've also got a millionaire playboy named Bruce Wayne who... apparently sleeps a lot.

Patti Stanger: Well, this should be interesting.

(Title card: The Superhero Millionaire Matchmaker)

Patti Stanger: Gentlemen, I've reviewed each of your videos. Iron Man, yours was... short.

(Iron Man's video plays.)

Iron Man: (Laughs) I am awesome!

Patti Stanger: And Batman, yours was... just scenes from your DVD.

(Batman's video plays.)

Batman: I don't have time for shenanigans.

Patti Stanger: Well, that's about to change, you ready to meet some ladies tonight?

Iron Man: You bet-cha.

Batman: I am the night. Great we're gonna have to work on that moody thing you got going on. Ladies say hello to a millionaire bachelors. Guys I'd like you to spend time with each of these women, Batman why don't you the Redhead.

Batman: The RED HOOD?!?!

(He throws them across the room.)

Batman: These look like my ears, but my ears are actually way down here. Covered with the cowl.

"Patti says your a thoughtful guy, are you thoughtful? Cause I have a sensitive heart.

Iron Man: Really? Me too. See?

(He tears his heart out.)

(Redhead faints.)

Iron Man: Too soon?

"I like gazing at the Stars and long walks in the moonlight. what do you like?

Batman: Vengeance.

(Batman Theme music plays.)

Batman: In the moonlight.

Redhead: I'm looking for some one who will be faithful. Could you be faithful?

Iron Man: Faithful!? (starts laughing)

(Cuts to Batman)

(Long silence)

Batman: My parents are dead.

(Scene goes back to Iron Man)

Iron Man: Faithful! (Laughs again)

Batman: So then Freeze starts crying about his wife or some junk and I punch you him the face, but enough aboutme how about you?

"Well I went to Julliard-"

Batman: No time, The bat signal!

Iron Man: And this is my place these are my cars, and this is my pull-up bar.

"So you just came out and told everyone that you're Iron man?"

Iron Man: Yep, don't like secrets.

"Really? What's your middle name?"

Iron Man: Merrill.

"Favorite movie?"

Iron Man: Beaches.

"And your bank password?

Iron Man: Easy, all my passwords are the word password.

Catwoman: Well he is honest so I will be too. I'm only here to steal all this stuff.

Patti Stanger: Well, you blew it. You did the exact opposite of everything I said. And as an result.

(Cut to Iron Man and Batman)

Patti Stanger: YOU didn't get a single phone number, and YOU got robbed. Do you have anything to say for yourself?

(Another long silence)

Batman: My parents are dead.

(Segment ends)

Trivia

This resembles CSiCarly, uGlee, Extreme Renovation: House Edition, Batman Family Feud, Ben 10 Franklin, Malcolm in the Middle Earth, Two and a Half Man, The Big Fang Theory, GleeVR from Force Code / Flammable, Captain America's Got Talent, Konan the Kardashian and How I Met Your Mummy.
Grey DeLisle reprises her role as Catwoman from Batman: Arkham City.
Antagonist: Catwoman
At the end of the sketch, it appears that Iron Man's heart was torn out. Also, he takes his heart out of his chest near the beginning. In both of these instances, he would die.
Batman says "My parents are dead" twice in this segment. First during Iron Man's laughing, then at the end as something he has to say for himself.

@@ Line 51: / Line 51: @@
 '''Batman''': I don't have time for shenanigans.
-'''Patti Stanger:''' Well, we do. This is the Redhead.
+'''Patti Stanger:''' Well,  that's about to change, you ready to meet some ladies tonight?
+'''Iron Man''': You bet-cha.
+'''Batman''': I am the night. Great we're gonna have to work on that moody thing you got going on. Ladies say hello to a millionaire bachelors. Guys I'd like you to spend time with each of these women,  Batman why don't you the Redhead.
 '''Batman: '''The ''RED HOOD?!?!''
@@ Line 59: / Line 63: @@
 '''Batman: '''These ''look ''like my ears, but my ears are actually way down here. Covered with the cowl.
-'''Redhead: '''I bet you're OK. 'Cause I have a sensitive heart.
+'''"'''Patti says your a thoughtful guy, are you thoughtful? Cause I have a sensitive heart.
 '''Iron Man: '''Really? Me too. See?
@@ Line 69: / Line 73: @@
 '''Iron Man: '''Too soon?
+"I like gazing at the Stars and long walks in the moonlight. what do you like?
-'''Batman: '''There's no time here.
-(Batman Family Feud music plays.)
+'''Batman: '''Vengeance.
+(Batman Theme music plays.)
-'''Redhead: '''I need someone who's faithful. Could you be faithful?
+'''Batman: '''In the moonlight.
+'''Redhead: '''I'm looking for some one who will be faithful. Could you be faithful?
 '''Iron Man: '''Faithful!? (starts laughing)
@@ Line 87: / Line 95: @@
 '''Iron Man: '''Faithful! (Laughs again)
+'''Batman: '''So then Freeze starts crying about his wife or some junk and I punch you him the face, but enough aboutme how about you?
-'''Batman: '''Well, we do have a-The bat signal!
+"Well I went to Julliard-"
+'''Batman: '''No time,''' '''The bat signal!
+'''Iron Man: '''And this is my place these are my cars, and this is my pull-up bar.
+"So you just came out and told everyone that you're Iron man?"
+'''Iron Man: '''Yep, don't like secrets.
+"Really? What's your middle name?"
+'''Iron Man: '''Merrill.
+"Favorite movie?"
+'''Iron Man: '''Beaches.
+"And your bank password?
+'''Iron Man: '''Easy, all my passwords are the word password.
+'''Catwoman: '''Well he is honest so I will be too. I'm only here to steal all this stuff.
-'''Patti Stanger: '''Well, you blew it. You did the exact opposite of everthing I said. And as an award..
+'''Patti Stanger: '''Well, you blew it. You did the exact opposite of everything I said. And as an result.
 (Cut to Iron Man and Batman)