WWe Bought a ZOO is a crossover between WWE (World Wrestling Entertainment) and We Bought a Zoo.
This segment is from MAD Season 2, Episode 17 (43): WWe Bought a ZOO / 2 Broke Powerpuff Girls.
Summary[]
A heartfelt family tale about a man who buys a zoo and gets body slammed repeatedly.
References[]
- WWF (WWE's original name)
- Dartmoor Zoological Park
- John Cena
- Kelly Kelly
- Rey Mysterio
- Triple H
Characters[]
- Benjamin Mee
- Dylan Mee
- Rosie Mee
- Mr. Stevens
- John Cena
- Kelly Kelly
- Rey Mysterio
- Triple H
- Giraffe
- Bear
- Elephant
- Rhino
- Otter
- Raccoon
- Lion
- Porcupine
- Zebra
- Bees
Transcript[]
(The scene begins.)
Benjamin Mee: There it is, kids. Our new home. It has everything we need to start over! Wide-open spaces, fresh air, (Animal noises.) and wild animals.
Mr. Stevens: You do realize you're buying a ZOO, right?
Benjamin Mee: No one else seems to want it!
Mr. Stevens: Actually, that's not true, but since you seem normal, we're going with you! (Hands the deed to Benjamin.)
Benjamin Mee: YAY! Look, gang! We bought a zoo!
(BAM! John Cena hits Benjamin Mee with a folding chair.)
John Cena: Correction: WE bought a zoo!
(Title card: WWe Bought a ZOO)
Benjamin Mee: You can't just take over! I'm the deed holder! (Shows his deed.)
John Cena: (Takes the deed.) ZOINK! Now I'm the deed holder!
Benjamin Mee: Yeah, that's not how land ownership works.
Rey Mysterio: No, but this is how a bodyslam works! (Bodyslams Benjamin.)
(Triple H and John Cena laugh.)
Benjamin Mee: Why do you even want a zoo?
Triple H: Well, we bought all the wrestling leagues, so the next logical step was a zoo!
Benjamin Mee: I don't follow.
Rey Mysterio: Oh, can you follow this? Bodyslam! (Bodyslams Benjamin again.)
(Scene goes to Triple H and an injured Benjamin Mee walking in the zoo.)
Triple H: See, the reason this zoo went out of business was because it's boring. We're gonna fix this place up and make it exciting!
Benjamin Mee: EXACTLY! Now I was thinking a gift shop would spice things up.
Triple H: Really? I was thinking we teach the animals how to WRESTLE!
Rey Mysterio: You need a "persona"! Without a mask, people will realize you don't have a personality. See? (Points to his mask.) Personality. (Points to a raccoon.) Personality. (Points to Benjamin Mee.) No personality. (Animal noise. Scene cuts to John Cena rapping with a lion.)
John Cena: If you want people to like you, you need to learn how to rap! You think you're a lion? Well, you are just a rat! OH! I rhyme "rap" with "rat"!
(They get into a fight, showing a sign saying "WARNING: Do not battle rap with the lion". Scene cuts to Triple H, Benjamin Mee, and a rhino dressed as a wrestler.)
Triple H: Okay, it's good, but it's not great.
Benjamin Mee: How about balloons?
Triple H: Did you say "drama"? (Scene zooms in on him.) That's perfect! People love drama!
Benjamin Mee: I don't think you understand.
(Rey Mysterio pops out of the bushes.)
Rey Mysterio: Did you say you want a bodyslam?
Benjamin Mee: (Pulls out a pitchfork.) NO, I DON'T! I don't want a bodyslam!
Rey Mysterio: Oh, I never realized that bothered you! I'll stop. Use your words, man. Use your words.
(John Cena and Kelly Kelly are seen with a zebra. John Cena is wearing a white t-shirt and holding a porcupine.)
John Cena: All right, porcupine! The key to wrestling is talking smack! Now insult that zebra's stupid stripes!
(The porcupine mumbles.)
Kelly Kelly: Aw, come on, stripey horse! Don't let that sharp, pointy cat talk to you like that?
John Cena: You wanna talk smack, Kelly, please! You think you can rap? Well, my shirt's full of bees! (Chuckles, the screen zooms out to reveal bees flying all over his shirt.) Oh, no! My shirt IS full of bees! OW! They're sting me! Now they're colonizing! Wait, oh! I think they're making honey! (A bear walks up to John.) OH, NO! Now the bear smells the honey! (The bear attacks him.)
Triple H: See, Drama.
Benjamin Mee: Is he gonna be okay?
Triple H: Wrestling is all fake man, you know that.
John Cena (weakly): I don't think the bear knows that. (Gets attacked by the bear again.) NO!
Triple H: You doubted me, but here we are, the opening night of the wildlife wrestling federation. The WWF!
"In this corner from the plains of Africa, weighing 550 pounds, please welcome Leo the Mangler Lion!
In this corner, from the river, weighing 22 pounds. Its dr. Otto soggy pants."
[Applause]
"This is awesome! Who knew Zoos were so awesome!"
"I'll never watch boring old human wrestling again."
Kelly: Shoot did we just put ourselves out of a job?
John Cena: I think we did.
Benjamin Mee: Oooh figurative body slam.
Rey Mysterio: Literal body slam!
Benjamin Mee: Ow!
Trivia[]
- The parody movie "We bought a zoo" was based on a true story.
- Antagonists: WWE Wrestlers
- Kelly Foster, Duncan Mee and Lily Miska did not appear in this.
- In the Latin American Version, Rey Mysterio spoke Mexican because he was born near Mexico.
- Also in the Latin America Version, John Cena said a bad word "stupid" a zebra, so it was censored.